Question: I try very hard to do the things God asks of His followers, like spending time with Him every day in prayer, reading the Bible, and going to church. But somehow I don’t feel the closeness with God that other Christians talk about. What could be preventing that?
Answer:
First, let me say this: your desire to obey the Lord is deeply meaningful to God. Jesus said, “If you love Me, keep My commandments” (John 14:15). Your daily prayers, your time in Scripture, your faithfulness to gather with other believers, none of that goes unnoticed. These are beautiful acts of devotion, and they are vital steps toward intimacy with the Father.
But closeness with God is not built on routine alone, it grows through relationship. Think about the people you love most. You didn’t become close to them by simply being in the same room. You learned what mattered to them, how they think, what brings them joy, and what burdens their heart. That level of connection took intentionality and time.
The same is true with God. If you long for deeper closeness—and clearly, you do—start by telling Him directly. God honors honesty. Invite the Holy Spirit into your study time and ask Him to open your mind to His truth (John 14:26). When you pray, slow down long enough to listen. Intimacy grows not only through talking to God but also through hearing from God.
Also, consider this: sometimes distance isn’t caused by lack of effort but by unaddressed barriers in the heart. If something in your life is hindering fellowship with God—sin, unforgiveness, pride, fear, or even spiritual numbness—the Holy Spirit will lovingly bring it to the surface. Not to shame you, but to free you. Jesus wants you transformed into His likeness, and part of that transformation involves allowing Him to expose what is unhealthy so He can heal it (John 16:8).
When you begin to cooperate with God in these moments—confessing, surrendering, and allowing Him to reshape your character—your intimacy with Him naturally deepens. The more your heart aligns with His, the more His presence becomes real, joyful, and tangible.
So keep praying. Keep reading. Keep gathering with God’s people. But also make it a regular rhythm to say, “Holy Spirit, reveal anything in me that hinders closeness with You. Teach me who the Father is.”
In time—and sooner than you think—you’ll move from simply knowing about God to truly walking with Him. And that closeness your heart longs for? It will become your daily reality.
